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Life, The Big Lebowski, and What Have You

Lebowski ipsum dO YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS, LARRY? Dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit praesent ac magna justo pellentesque ac lectus quis. Mr. Lebowski asked me to repeat that: Her life is in your hands. Elit blandit fringilla a ut turpis praesent felis ligula, malesuada suscipit malesuada non. That is our most modestly priced receptacle. Ultrices non urna sed orci ipsum, placerat id condimentum rutrum, rhoncus. Yeah man, it really tied the room together. Ac lorem aliquam placerat posuere neque, at dignissim magna ullamcorper in aliquam sagittis massa.

Zere ARE no ROOLZ! Ac tortor ultrices faucibus curabitur. I SAY VEE CUT OFF YOUR CHONSON! Eu mi sapien, ut ultricies. Excuse me! Mark it zero. Next frame. Ipsum morbi eget risus nulla nullam vel nisi enim, vel auctor. When will you find these guys? I mean, do you have any promising leads? Ante morbi id urna vel felis lacinia placerat vestibulum turpis nulla, viverra. Za, okay, I bring mein toolz. Nec volutpat ac, ornare id.

Vee vant zat money, Lebowski. Lectus cras pharetra faucibus tristique nullam non accumsan justo nulla. It increases the chances of conception. Facilisi integer interdum elementum nulla, nec eleifend nisl euismod ac maecenas vitae. Your “revolution” is over, Mr. Lebowski! Condolences! The bums lost! Eros velit, eu suscipit erat integer purus lacus, pretium vel venenatis eu, volutpat non. To use the parlance of our times. Erat donec a metus ac eros dictum aliquet nulla consectetur.

You want a toe? I can get you a toe, believe me. There are ways, Dude. You don’t wanna know about it, believe me. Egestas placerat maecenas pulvinar nisl et. Wal, I lost m’chain of thought here. But—aw hell, I done innerduced him enough. Nisl rhoncus at volutpat felis blandit in libero turpis. I’m unemployed. Laoreet et molestie sed, volutpat et erat nulla. Say friend, ya got any more a that good sarsaparilla? Ut orci quis neque consectetur tincidunt aliquam erat volutpat donec aliquam orci eget mi.

A dick, man! And let me tell you something: I dig your work. Playing one side against the other —in bed with everybody— fabulous stuff, man. Lobortis sed tincidunt diam mattis fusce sem quam, ultricies sed. Dieter doesn’t care about anything. He’s a nihilist. Convallis ac, hendrerit eu urna curabitur varius egestas nibh id lacinia vestibulum. Mind if I smoke a jay? Laoreet lobortis massa nec condimentum aliquam erat volutpat.

Two Books with Horrible Dating Advice

When I was single, I hated dating—which is probably why I didn’t do much of it. There are so many unspoken rules, and girls play games, and it’s enough to make you want to become a celibate monk. Okay, it’s not quite that bad. Fortunately, I was lucky enough to find the right girl, and the rest is history.

Raven: My year of dating dangerously - Monica Porter

Raven: My year of dating dangerously – Monica Porter

But even though my “game” probably sucked, I knew some common rules of dating. I mean, the really, really basic do’s and don’ts.

The same can’t be said for some of these characters from literature. These guys and girls really knew how to screw up some relationships.

Here’s the type of advice they might give you based on their stories.

“Girly, spineless men are the most attractive kind of men. Obsess over them, and never stop obsessing over them.”

–Scarlett O’Hara (Gone With The Wind)

We all know Rhett Butler had serious game. You know who had terrible game? Ashley Wilkes, the man whom Scarlett spends almost the entirety of Gone With The Wind obsessing over. She’s the worst. She’s the literal worst.

“If you stalk her enough, she’ll eventually love you.”

–Gatsby (The Great Gatsby)

Textbook Romance - Zoe Foster

Textbook Romance – Zoe Foster

Ladies, if you knew that a dude built his house across the lake just so he could stand on a dock and longingly stare at a light on your dock, and if you knew that same dude threw million dollar parties in hopes you’d show up, and if you also knew that same dude liked to hide in the bushes outside your house, wouldn’t you just fall head over heels in love? Or maybe you’d just call the police. It’s a miracle Daisy never had a restraining order put out on Gatsby.

Ladies, if you knew that a dude built his house across the lake just so he could stand on a dock and longingly stare at a light on your dock, and if you knew that same dude threw million dollar parties in hopes you’d show up, and if you also knew that same dude liked to hide in the bushes outside your house, wouldn’t you just fall head over heels in love? Or maybe you’d just call the police. It’s a miracle Daisy never had a restraining order put out on Gatsby.

Photo Series

To place among other colors and forms

A solid aluminum bar, painted a striking red-orange, and bearing the text “TO PLACE AMONG OTHER COLORS AND FORMS.” Limited to a numbered edition of 25 with accompanying edition card, produced and signed by Clark.

This is an artwork intended to occupy different areas of your home over time, creating new relational experiences in areas you may have become “blind” to from over-familiarity. This piece asks you to re-see the arrangement it sits with as a group of colors and forms, and how the perception of that grouping changes with the introduction of this color and this form.

2 feet long x 1 inch square. 2.6 lbs.

This item is available in our Oakland and New York stores.

Sticky Wall

Writing, Creativity and Motivation

Voltaire is reputed to have said to a client “… madam, here is the novel you commissioned it’s in two volumes, if I had more time I could have written it in one.” What a dramatic statement! It gets to the heart of new writers problems – how to be clear and concise.

As an established writer I am frequently asked for advice but fail miserably in supplying answers. I have been writing now for over 40 years and still cannot give a clear prescription for the aspiring novelist. But here are some ideas.

Firstly, start from a base in which you have some competence or knowledge. I was asked recently to review a manuscript produced by a female. What a surprise – and yet it wasn’t a surprise. The plot was clear, too clear from the beginning. I suspected it was a paradigm of Mills & Boon with little originality by the writer, so here’s another pointer – originality.

My first steps into the writing dimension began at school. I was awarded the prize, a novel, for writing and I used the narrative to form the plot for my next writing venture the following year. Much to my astonishment another prize was gained. I didn’t write thereafter for fifteen years as work took up all my attention.

I decided to undertake post graduate studies in management, this led me into academic life and all its demands for writing articles, albeit academic. The big test came with my Doctorate – it extended to 121,000 words but it proved to me that I could sustain arguments.

My novels are based on experience and an extensive vocabulary of reading. So let me emphasise the need for new writers to research the ‘environment’ around their works. Get the realism, facts and appeal correct and your off to a good start.

What about the process? Well there’s no magic formula. I find I can write best in the late afternoon and early evening – perhaps five hours at a stretch. Others will have different approaches when say a chapter at a time can be written. Do what you are content with. If you have to force yourself you may be destroying the creative drives.

It’s essential to have inspiration, without this you have no real appeal. This may come from your personal circumstances, from friends, work situations or just a ‘bolt of lightening’ among many inspiring thoughts you have day by day.

Finally can I say something about motivation. It’s all up to you no one can motivate you, and certainly the thought of high income is a non- starter for most of us. Even once a book has been completed it is essential to keep thinking positively as you send endless manuscripts to literary editors, most of whom are masters at scuppering you earnest endeavours. All of your powers of motivation will be severely tried as you go about finding a publisher.